Holiday Loneliness And Coping With It

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Photo Credit: Irishtimes.com
Holiday Loneliness

The holidays bring together family, friends and a boatload of stress, the blues, and even isolation. This can be attributed to many reasons.

First, we have our own personal expectations, and those people around us help to contribute to the continued pressure and less-than feelings. Everyone is different and everyone is different in different stages of their lives.

Levels of Expectation

Different stages of our lives bring different feelings. Happiness is gauged by feeling. Examples can be anything from becoming a new empty-nester, to suffering a loss of a loved one near to you. You are considered vulnerable during times such as these. These, however, may be brief in nature or have even varying degrees of loneliness associated with them, But interestingly most psychologists agree that another level of loneliness can be associated with your personal self-worth or self-esteem.

Definitions

A simple Oxford dictionary definition renders this:

Loneliness:
1. sadness because one had no friends or company
2.(of a place) the quality of being unfrequented and remote; isolation.

But psychologists define it somewhat differently and wider:
According to Britannica.com (science)


Loneliness, distressing experience that occurs when a person’s social relationships are perceived by that person to be less in quantity, and especially in quality, than desired. The experience of loneliness is highly subjective; an individual can be alone without feeling lonely and can feel lonely even when with other people. Psychologists generally consider loneliness to be a stable trait, meaning that individuals have different set-points for feeling loneliness, and they fluctuate around these set-points depending on the circumstances in their lives.


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photo credit: Sciencealert.com
We all know we can suffer from past traumas. These can leave us with emotional scars. It is how we cope that makes the difference.

Coping

We as people tend to feed our own less-than-adequate feelings, and those of loneliness. A great way to cope with all of this is to seek the company of others. Even if one doesn't have a close friend or family nearby, one should head off to the shopping mall or go to a busy coffee shop. Engage in interesting activities by joining a group. If you do have a close family or friend, one should share your feelings with them.
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photo credit: shutterstock.com
What To Avoid

Most professionals and doctors agree that one should avoid social media at all costs. There are too many ways we as people put undue comparisons on ourselves vis social media. They truly advise limiting your usage as one way to cope.
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Taking Care Of Yourself

Always care for yourself first. If you didn't make 10 dozen cookies for the Christmas party, just eliminate it from your list of things to do. Period. Learning to say no. Taking the burden from yourself. No one is going to miss them, and if they do, simply apologize and say I had too much on my plate; maybe next year. Do only the priorities. Then and only then, reevaluate your list to include crossed off items. 

Make Yourself Feel Good

Get a good night's sleep. Shower or take a nice bath before bed, drink a warm chamomile tea. Avoid caffeine, alcohol, turn off the television, turn off the computer, and turn off the phone. Practice meditation and visualization, this is a great way to set your mind at ease and get you ready to sleep naturally.

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Photo Credit: motivationandchange.com

Last Notes:

Know that many people feel this way, and experience these types of loneliness feelings. Please know that you are living a regular life and it isn't realistic to try to attain the life of an Instagrammer you follow; whose house is expertly decorated and the wrapped gifts are show-stopping nor or even the life of someone in a movie. The things you see on social media or on television shows are truly fictional.

One needs to put themselves first. Feel good about all that you do accomplish, adjust the burdens that you carry during the holidays. Dole out responsibilities to others, or cut your to-do list in half. 
Doing these things should have you celebrating a wonderful, less-stressful and more enjoyable holiday season.

Disclaimer:
*This article is for the enjoyment of my Lifestyle readers. This blog does not provide medical advice, nor does it diagnose any problems medical or not. Please seek the advice of your family doctor. I have provided some phone numbers and websites below for further reference and information.

The Institute On Aging Toll-Free number 1 (800) 971-0016

Crisistextline.org    for information and text to phone advice, services USA, UK, and CA

For UK residents https:// www.campaigntoendloneliness.org.uk 






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